Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Winter...

Its freezing, i went to look for a new jacket for my upcoming getaway to the east coast. Low and behold the stores have the spring/summer line out. At first thought, are you kidding me? its 30 degrees and you have a a bathing suit up? Its oklahoma...

on to other things. Its been 3 weeks and counting with my second job. I'll admit that is some crucial thing. Considering how my schedule is already limited as it is. 40/hr week as well as school. To add another 20 hours of work..its madness. But im dealing atleast till i get my finance stable or paid off. boo..

So, god is working in mysterious ways. Im keeping my faith in him. I'll fill in the details as soon as it is all gets clear-er..

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;

In all your ways acknoledge Him,

And He shall direct your paths.

Do not be wise in your own eyes;

-PROVERBS 3:5-5


These past few days has been testy to say the least. But kepted praying and asking him for strength. Well my prayers have been answer to that part of my worries. As of now i am working 2 jobs. 7 days a week,56 hours a week, 204 hours in a month. I prayed for help with things financially, and he lead me to a 2nd job. Granite its nothing grand, but i am grateful. I went back to food service @ a retirement community. Which im really hoping to gain some insights because i feel like im lacking. Im pretty excited actually.

So, my dad is my hero. Tonight, i read he's files from years ago. This man has been in remission for 15 years from Squamos Cell Carcinoma, Stage-4. They call him a walking miracle. He's battle was actually one of the influence in why i wanted to get into the field of Radiology. As we were talking over dinner, it wasn't anything i have heard before about he's time with that deadly disease. Except, tonight he had shared that he could never get another radiated exam again. For the reason that at that time, the dosage was so extreme they had nicknamed it "megadosage". It came into my mind that i wanted to read he's medical file. So i asked, of course he shared the stack of papers that was neatly put into a manila envelope. I was browsing through it reading every detailed of the diagnosis, the treatments, the effects of he's therapy that will explain why he has the allergens that he goes through now. In amazed of gratefulness, i know i can never be even close to the heroic person my dad is. Words can't even describe how this man is respected by not only me ,my brothers, and my other family members. I just cherish him, not only because of this, nor because he raised us with the thought of all the trials of life that have greeted us, but because he's truly one of a kind. He has that sense of charm that no one can get away from, he's corny jokes, he's funny little laugh when he gets tickled at something. I love my pa, thats just the way it is...

=)

Thursday, January 3, 2008

random things

life is too short to not be in love.

the kind of love that gives you butterflies.

the kind of love that keeps you up at night.

this is the love we should have for life.


burr, its cold outside. 20 degrees to be exact. i have approximately 7 mins till i need to be ready. Although i have 45 mins to get to work. I shall need that 15 mins to warm up my baby. I wasn't sure if i was going to make a resolution this year. But somethings that have stuck and also that is nice to have a reminder.

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS and THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO:
- eat healthier; focus on having a healthy lifestyle and diet...treat my body right for once
- adventure. do new things and step out of my box
- focus and finish. to concentrate on a few things and follow them through
- prioritize. make more time for my family, friends, me! - relax and live! take time out to breathe yet live each moment (stress free).

Classes resume again next week, i still yet to buy some of my books. Im very much looking forward to them. I need focus and something to stimulate my mind. This year is very different. This year, my girls aren't in reaching distance. This year We're all spread out from different state. I miss them terribly. If this is not hard to phatom, its like putting me on a bike strolling through a long winding road on a foggy morning. No one to giggle with,no one i can turn to and expect them to push me down that direction...Its life, but for now i know i can always bust out my cell phone bug them..lol..


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1 Timothy 4:12
"Don't let anyone look down on
you because you areyoung,
but set an example for the believers
in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity."


PARADOX: I am the black and the white...rarely the in between. Sometimes I want to listen and absorb insight. Other times I want to jump at the world and make my presence known. Sometimes I want people to make that substantial effort to penetrate through the walls that I build around my emotions. Other times, I'd much rather be
left alone.
I'm a paradox within myself. I'm an unsolved puzzle; a road

in

different
directions.
If you choose, drive
down
my
road......

but keep your seatbelt on.

--Eric Calvario

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

survey for 07

1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before? Stay true to myself and keep up with the fact you don't got to be drizunk to have fun..

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
honestly, i don't remember what my resolution was. I think it was something close to like be nice to people even if you don't like them. Which i did..

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Hahaha, yeah i think the whole tulsa area did. Seriously.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, r.i.p. tita isabel

5. What countries did you visit?
none this year, next year..

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
Concentration on my studies, As well as achieve my goals in my dieting..haha

7. What date(s) from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I would have to say, 3.17, 6.10.,8.31.
Those were the times the girls got together and partied. I miss them..

Oct-2007
family time in vegas
partying with buds..
Nothing can compare to the partying we did, my two bros and cousins
5 clubs, drunk gay couple fighting in the hood and Dean Martin & paradise Avenue, will remain a very fond memory for me and the pan that buds tainted in my car..=)



8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
courage

9. What was your biggest failure?
none.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?Luckily no.

11. What was the best thing you bought?Again..presents for friends and family.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?Cousins<3333

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? money hungry people..

14. Where did most of your money go?School...credit card bills

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
my new car, fully loaded Accord coupe

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
A lot of songs i can dance to "Gimme more" "Piece of Me" "shhawty got low low low low" "Her bodys like a cyclone and she can move it all night long" .. lol cliche songs. " Hate that i love you" by rihanna and neyo"Big Girls Dont Cry" by Fergie

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Wiser
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?focus on myself. achieve my goals

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?Procrastinate.

20. How will you be spending Christmas? i worked, than had family time

22. Did you fall in love in 2007? can't say i did..

23. How many one-night stands?oh my..

24. What was your favorite TV program?No time for tv. but project runway stiilll awweesome.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?Hating is a waste of time.

26. What was the best book you read?i know the worst... school Textbooks! ughhh . ill burn them. or resell. lol i need the money hahah

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?classical, rhythm, soul, lounge, relaxing shit.

28. What did you want and got?
my car, job change that was a career advancement.

29. What did you want and not get?materialistc things..haha
i always go for necessities.


30. What was your favorite film of this year?uhhmm.. ionno. ill catch up on that.


31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Goodness, i turned 23. Went to dinner with mai and mary. since the rest of the girls were out of state getting settled.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Getting into the Rad Program

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
Hahah..uhm that is my downfall..when you work 40hr weeks and all you know is scrubs. heel is def out of the question

34. What kept you sane?Knowing that other people are not in my control as hard as i try to make things right. Taking INITIATIVE for whatever obstacle that comes through. Listening to the two sides of every situation, every story before making a opinion/decision.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?I respect Natalie Portman. Shes amazing. Like my own values, I trust my instinct. She quotes, " You can make the choice to have joy and spread joy.":

36. What political issue stirred you the most?The death of Benazir Bhutto.

37. Who did you miss?the girls..and the bodyguard he's fun..

38. Who was the best new person you met?the "party" side of my cousins...pretty damn awesome.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007."Its okay to desire someone with standards in mind because know how much good we can offer in return.." "Demand Respect because you give Respect in Return."

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year... i have yet to find.